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MS Paint, the first app you used for editing images, will probably be killed off in future updates of Windows 10, replaced by the new app Paint 3D. Microsoft lists. Everything you need to know about the latest smartphones, tablets, smartwatches and more. RIP, Microsoft Paint. MS Paint, the first app you used for editing images, will probably be killed off in future updates of Windows 1. Paint 3. D. Microsoft lists the 3. Windows 1. 0’s next autumn update, a little X marking the end of an era. The app is certainly a relic, from a time when the casual computer user couldn’t crack open Photoshop or Skitch or Pixelmator or thousands of web apps. MS Paint can’t save image components as layers or vectors; it’s for making flat static images only. It doesn’t smooth lines or guess at your best intentions. It does what you tell it and nothing more, faithfully representing the herky- jerky motion of drawing freehand with a computer mouse. It’s from a time before touch, a time before trackpads. As more sophisticated options appeared, Paint’s janky aesthetic became a conscious choice. Paint” became the metonym for that aesthetic, even if an image was actually created in another app. TV Tropes lists major limitations that came to define a certain look: the wobbly freehand lines, awkward color handling, and inappropriate export settings that give Paint its distinctive look. Top VIdeos. Warning: Invalid argument supplied for foreach() in /srv/users/serverpilot/apps/jujaitaly/public/index.php on line 447. In 2. 01. 4, Gawker’s Sam Biddle noted Paint’s influence on conspiracy theory images, calling the form “Chart Brut.” In amateur detectives’ attempts at identifying the Boston Marathon bombers, the simplicity and jaggedness of Paint evokes the “crazy wall” aesthetic of red string and scribbled notes, apparently without irony. The same year, internet historian Patrick Davison explored Paint’s influence on the last decade of meme culture, particularly Rage Comics. The outsider- art aesthetic feels appropriate to the relatable everyday content, and makes the art form unthreatening. Of course, Paint offered a few features to smooth things out, like the circle and line tools and the “fill” tool, all used in the stoner comics of the early 1. Crucially, those circles still had jagged curves. The bright colors of stoner comics are flat, as MS Paint didn’t support gradients (without an elaborate hack). Contrast those pixellated lines with the slick, stylish face from this art tutorial: This slickness is built into Paint’s successor, Paint 3. D. From the moment you start sketching, Paint 3. D smooths out your art. It also supports automatic selection tools and content- aware fill to rival Photoshop’s.)By automatically improving art, Paint 3. D hides the process behind the image. Paint’s sloppiness is probably why rage comics got so popular. Looking at a rage comic, you can tell exactly how it was drawn, and how you might draw one yourself. By delivering exactly what the artist draws, MS Paint forms an image that the viewer can mentally reverse- engineer and imitate. Unless you go absolutely nuts with it. Reddit user Toweringhorizon painstakingly assembled the drawing “To a Little Radio” using MS Paint tools like the oil brush, stretching the medium while maintaining a pixelated look. It’s one of the top submissions to MS Paint subreddit, a beautiful collaborative art gallery. Scrolling through this art feels like flipping through the sketchbook of the most artistic kid in high school. There’s an accepted roughness, a desired minimalism. For example, the exquisite raindrops in the work above are reflected in a flat, featureless tabletop. Like a transistor radio, Paint might be showing its age, but this tenacious little gadget should not be underestimated.“To a Little Radio” doesn’t even come close to testing Paint’s limits. As we say goodbye to the app that shaped an era, let us watch this bizarrely soundtracked time lapse of drawing Santa Claus in MS Paint on Windows 7 over the course of 5. We can only believe this is real because faking it would be even harder. Annex 8 | Environmental Remediation{{confirm_text}}{{cancel_label}}{{confirm_label}}" data- delete_collection="canceldelete list" data- delete_empty_collection="Are you sure you want to delete this list? Everything you selected will also be removed from your lists. · So please suggest Echo cancellation or suppressor. I need Echo cancellation readymade module for HW. I need Echo. Express Helpline- Get answer of your question fast from real experts. The Ricoh 5A22 is a microprocessor. almost all the games on the VS. System run on identical hardware. furthermore, the 64DDs software titles and hardware. Saved" data- remove_from_library="This book will also be removed from all your lists. Saved" data- change_library_state="" data- remove_from_collection="" data- error="" data- audio_reading_progress="You& #3. However, it looks like you listened to {{listened_to}} on {{device_name}} {{time}}. Jump {{jump_to}}? No. Yes" data- delete_review="{{content_line_one}}{{content_line_two}}cancel. Delete" data- notify_personalization="We& #3. Explore now" class="confirmation_lightbox_templates">. Solved: HP LT4. 11. Gobi 4. G Driver / Software - Page 2 - HP Support Forum. Final fix to this issue! Hi all. After working on this issue for what seems to be weeks, we have spent hours trying to get this to work. Situation: We bought ~7 of the HP 6. Pro X2 tablets for use in our enterprise enviroment. As standard we always image our devices with our own cooperate image. Note that I feel if you use the HP OEM image it will likely work out of the box, but have not tested it as it's not a viable option for us. Also note as someone has already mentioned in this thread, that the GOBI device is a re- branded Huawei ME9. E. The instructions provided by the user ulfun in the post above are half of a solution but not really the correct solution, as you only need the HP drivers SP6. HP drivers website that are around 3. MB, not the newer 'Gobi 4g' drivers that are 1. MB+ - I did not use those. After installing our image, and our MDT server deployed all of the drivers, the HP GOBI lt. I tried to install the drivers from the HP website (sp. As many people find, the installer does not actually install the drivers. You will still have 4 outstanding drivers for the GOBI 4. G device. We do not typically use 3. G or 4. G in our business so we did not worry initally. A few days later a user came back to us that wanted to use the 3. G function. As we knew we could not get the drivers to install we called HP and logged a case - HP spent hours remoting onto the tablet and re- installing the drivers, with no success. In the end they sent us a system restore CD which would restore the original factory image, which is not a viable option for us. After further searching online, I have determined the problem. If you look in your device manager, under USB controllers/device catagory, there will be a device named 'USB Mobile Broadband device', or something similar to this (I have already updated it now so the name has changed.) One user on another forum thread mentioned it had a geman name, but for me it was just called something like 'HP Mobile Broadband USB'. You need to right click this device, and update the driver. When you update the driver, choose 'browse for drivers on my computer' and point it to the 'C: \Sw. Setup\SP6. 62. 43' location. It should find the CORRECT driver for this device and update. The one it already has will be incorrect. The device will now be named 'USB Composite Device' and now that it works, you can go back and install the 4 outstanding GOBI drivers by choosing 'browse for drivers' and pointing to either 'C: \Sw. Setup\SP6. 62. 43' or 'C: \program files (x. HP 3. G Mobile Broadband' folder as we were trying before. This list of hardware is from: https://en.bitcoin.it/wiki/Mining_rig. Typical Dedicated Miner Configurations Using a Tower. One ATI 5830, Approximately 245 Mhash/s. · Hi, References to Vista also apply to Windows 7. Updating drivers, BIOS, and control software (if any) is a good idea. This is my generic how to for proper driver. CitectSCADA Knowledgebase Documentation Home. The CitectSCADA Knowledgebase; Navigating; License Agreement; Latest Articles. Q5821: HF700SP248661 - Combined Hotfix. · I had both the problems in fact, I missed the ATI drivers which I put back in the windows folder using Option 2 in the link provided. Then I had also a. So in conclusion, the issue in Windows 8. USB controller' catagory in device manager installs automatically with the wrong driver. It seems to serve some function to the GOBI devices, so you need to install the correct driver for this 'USB mobile broadband' item before the others. Thanks all. I had to post this fix as it was causing us a lot of trouble, and hope it helps some other people. Jack Hawkins - Wikipedia. John Edward Hawkins, CBE (1. September 1. 91. 0 – 1. July 1. 97. 3) was an English actor who worked on stage and in film from the 1. One of the most popular British film stars of the 1. Angels One Five (1. The Cruel Sea (1. Bridge on the River Kwai (1. Ben Hur (1. 95. 9) and Lawrence of Arabia (1. He was born at 4. Lyndhurst Road, Wood Green, now in Haringey, London, the son of a builder. He was educated at Wood Green's Trinity County Grammar School, where, aged eight, he joined the school choir.[2]By the age of ten Hawkins had joined the local operatic society, and made his stage debut in Patience by Gilbert and Sullivan. His parents enrolled him in the Italia Conti Academy and whilst he was studying there he made his London stage debut, when aged eleven, playing the Elf King in Where the Rainbow Ends at the Holborn Empire on Boxing Day, December 1. Noël Coward.[2] The following year aged 1. Saint Joan by George Bernard Shaw.[3] Five years later he was in a production of Beau Geste alongside Laurence Olivier.[4]He appeared on Broadway in Journey's End by the age of 1. In the 1. 93. 0s Hawkins' focus was on the stage. He worked in the companies of Sybil Thorndike, John Gielgud and Basil Dean.[6] His performances included Port Said by Emlyn Williams (1. Below the Surface by HL Stoker and LS Hunt (1. Red Triangle by Val Gielgud (1. Service by CI Anthony, for director Basil Dean (1. One of Us by Frank Howard, As You Like It by William Shakespeare (1. Iron Flowers by Cecil Lewis (1. Jessica Tandy his wife). He did start appearing in films, predominantly "quota quickies" of the time: Birds of Prey (1. The Lodger (1. 93. Ivor Novello), The Good Companions (1. Intermodal transport combines the accessibility of inland transport modes with the long-haul capabilities of ocean shipping. Intermodal transport can be defined as. 101 Greatest Screenplays compiles the finest achievements in film writing, as voted upon by professional film and television writers of the Writers Guild of America. Online Professional Development For Teachers by Hol.edu, a leader in educator professional development and continuing education since 1975. © 2000-2016 Groundspeak Inc. All Rights Reserved. Groundspeak Terms of Use | Privacy Policy. The Lost Chord (1. I Lived with You (1. The Jewel (1. 93. A Shot in the Dark (1. Autumn Crocus (1. In 1. 93. 2 he was in a radio production of Hamlet with John Gielgud and Robert Donat and the following year he was in Danger. He was also in Death at Broadcasting House (1. Lorna Doone (1. 93. Peg of Old Drury (1. Stage roles included Iron Mistress (1. Arthur Macrae; then an open air Shakespeare festival – As You Like It (1. Anna Neagle), Twelfth Night (1. Comedy of Errors (1. Some of these productions were done on radio. The Maitlands by Ronald Mackenzie (1. John Gielgud's company. He was Horatio to Gielgud's Hamlet (1. He also appeared in Accidentally Yours by Clifford Grey (1. The World Waits by Clifford Hummel (1. Coincidence by Bryce Robertson (1. The Frog (1. 93. 5). Films in the late 1. Beauty and the Barge (1. The Frog (1. 93. 7) (which Hawkins played on stage), Who Goes Next? A Royal Divorce (1. Murder Will Out (1. The Flying Squad (1. Theatre appearances included A Winter's Tale (1. Autumn by Margaret Kennedy and Gregory Ratoff (1. Flora Robson for Basil Dean), The King's Breakfast by Rita Welman and Maurice Marks (1. No More Music by Rosamund Lehman (1. Can We Tell? by Robert Gore Brown (1. Traitors Gate by Norma Stuart (1. Dear Octopus by Dodie Smith (1. Second World War[edit]During the Second World War Hawkins served as an officer with the Royal Welch Fusiliers.[7] He became a colonel in ENSA for India and Southeast Asia.[7] During his military service he made The Next of Kin (1. Ealing Studios. Post- war career[edit]Hawkins left the army in July 1. Two weeks later he appeared on stage in The Apple Cart at ten pounds a week. The following year he starred in Othello, to a mixed reception.[8]Hawkins's wife became pregnant and he became concerned about his future. He decided to accept a contract with Alexander Korda for three years at £5. Hawkins had been recommended to Korda by the latter's production executive, Bill Bryden, who was married to Elizabeth Allen, who had worked with Hawkins.[8]The association began badly when Hawkins was cast in Korda's notorious flop Bonnie Prince Charlie (1. Lord George Murray. However he followed it with a good role in the successful, highly acclaimed The Fallen Idol (1. Carol Reed. Also acclaimed was The Small Back Room (1. Powell and Pressburger; he impressed as the villain in State Secret (1. Sidney Gilliat with Douglas Fairbanks Jnr. He was recruited by 2. Century Fox to support Tyrone Power and Orson Welles in an expensive epic, The Black Rose (1. He made another with Powell and Pressburger for Korda, The Elusive Pimpernel (1. Prince of Wales. Hawkins played the lead in The Adventurers (1. South Africa, then had a good role in another Hollywood- financed film shot in Britain, No Highway in the Sky (1. James Stewart. It was followed by a British thriller with Ralph Richardson, Home at Seven (1. In the spring of 1. Broadway and played Mercutio in a production of Romeo and Juliet with Olivia de Havilland.[8]Stardom[edit]Hawkins became a star with the release of three successful films in which he played stern but sympathetic authority figures: Angels One Five (1. RAF officer during the war; The Planter's Wife (1. Malayan Emergency (with Claudette Colbert); and Mandy (1. All films ranked among the top ten most popular films at the British box office in 1. British exhibitors voted him the fourth most popular British star at the local box office.[9]Hawkins consolidated his new status with The Cruel Sea, playing a driven naval officer in the war. Sir Michael Balcon said, "Even before the script was written, we knew it had to be Jack Hawkins. If he hadn't been free to play the part, then there wouldn't have been a film."[8]The Cruel Sea was the most successful film of the year and saw Hawkins voted the most popular star in Britain regardless of nationality.[1. According to one obituary he "exemplified for many cinemagoers the stiff upper lip tradition prevalent in post war British films. His craggy looks and authoritative bearing were used to good effect whatever branch of the services he represented."[4]Malta Story (1. Hawkins as an RAF officer in the Siege of Malta during the war. It too was a hit, the ninth most popular film in Britain in 1. He had a guest role in Twice Upon a Time (1. Emeric Pressburger. He followed this with two mildly popular dramas – The Intruder (1. Front Page Story (1. The Seekers (1. 95. New Zealand and cast Hawkins in a rare romantic role. My film wives to date usually stay home and knit, or else have conveniently died before the film starts." he said.[1. It was followed by The Prisoner (1. Alec Guinness). None of these films were that successful but Hawkins was still voted the fifth biggest star at the British box office for 1. British one.[1. 3][1. It's an enviable position, I know", said Hawkins. But I have to be more careful now about the parts I choose, and it's hard not to offend people. Everyone thinks his own script is the best."[1. He turned down the role of Colonel Carne in The Glorious Gloucesters for Warwick Films and Captain Cook for a project for the Rank organisation; [3] neither movie was made."I'm tired of playing decent fellows", he said in a 1. I'm going to kill them off before they kill me as an actor. And I want stories written for me, not rejects intended for other fellows.. I just inherit them from other people. Often, I find they've left the name of the actor originally suggested for the role. Always the same old names . Errol Flynn, Gregory Peck . Before the script reaches them, somebody remembers me — especially if it's one of those infernally nice characters."[1. International star[edit]Hawkins got his wish when he received a Hollywood offer to play a pharaoh for Howard Hawks in Land of the Pharaohs (1. He returned home to make an Ealing comedy, Touch and Go (1. He was more comfortably cast as a police officer in The Long Arm (1. The Man in the Sky (1. He was an insurance investigator in Sidney Gilliat's Fortune Is a Woman (1. Hawkins's career received a major boost when given the third lead in The Bridge on the River Kwai (1. William Holden and Alec Guinness. This was a massive hit and highly acclaimed. He was awarded the CBE in 1. Hawkins played the lead role a film for John Ford, Gideon's Day (USA title: Gideon of Scotland Yard) (1. He had a good role as a double agent in a war film, The Two- Headed Spy (1. Hollywood blockbuster Ben- Hur (1. Roman admiral who befriends Charlton Heston. It was even more successful than Bridge on the River Kwai. He appeared as one of The Four Just Men (1. Sapphire Films TV series for ITV, one of the most ambitious British TV series ever made.[1. He also played the lead in a version of "The Fallen Idol" for American TV. In reality Hawkins was politically liberal, and an emotional man, in sharp contrast to his conservative screen image. Online Professional Development For Teachers. Art. Course No. ED4. L, ED5. 44. LInstructor: Debora Supplitt. Since 1. 93. 8, the American Library Association has awarded the Caldecott Medal annually for to the artist of the most distinguished American picture book for children. This fun- filled guided independent study course will cover the history of the medal and Randolph Caldecott, explore the creative artists who have received this medal, delve into selected winners and honors books, and create various art media lessons for the classroom. Course No. ED4. 33. C, ED5. 33. CInstructor: Mary Ann Johnson. Follow Eric Jensen's guidebook, Arts With the Brain in Mind, to enhance students' creative, expressive and reflective abilities. The arts are a wonderfully humanistic way to teach all subjects better, for arts educators and other teachers alike, and Jensen has proven to be one of the most readable and enthusiastic authors for educators. Course No. ED4. 44. S, ED5. 44. SInstructor: Debora Supplitt. Research has shown that art education provides challenges for students on all levels. This course is designed for teachers of all grades, K- 1. Course No. ED4. 50. J, ED5. 40. JInstructor: Doug Larson. Learn how to use drama techniques to make everyday classroom lessons come to life. Drama Games give teachers a new educational tool for any subject by using improvisational theatre concepts as an active form of learning. Course No. ED4. 57. S, ED5. 57. SInstructor: Debora Supplitt. This course incorporates Observational Drawing Skills (ODS) based on drawing and design principles that guide participants through the process of creating successful, realistic looking, still life drawings. Teacher- artists who want to develop, support or advance their ODS will purchase the “Introduction To Advanced Observational Drawing” video course to access thirty (3. ODS content. The lessons are open to all ability levels, from emerging to advance drawing skills. Lessons are broken down into a series of small concepts that build upon each other so that participants can practice each concept before incorporating it into their overarching still life project. From hands on practice projects, exemplars and skill building, lesson plans will be developed for implementation for any studio and/or classroom setting. Classroom Management. Course No. ED4. 48. H, ED5. 48. HInstructor: Mary Ann Johnson. The book for this course introduces you to the most typical student types and how best to work with them such as: the Good Kids, the Rebels, the Perfectionists, the Invisibles and more. With each introduction, there will be ample information on what is needed and how to work best with that student. Course No. ED4. 48. G, ED5. 48. GInstructor: Mary Ann Johnson. The 9. 9 strategies explored in this course are going to help you engage your students. And you will find boredom's been banished from your classroom and from your teaching as well. Course No. ED4. 30. CInstructor: Mary Ann Johnson. This course provides authoritative and reality- based best practices in classroom management from some of our best educational researchers, including Robert Marzano, Jana Marzano and Debra Pickering. It clarifies both what to do, and how to do it, with ample examples and action steps. Course No. ED4. 45. X, ED5. 45. XInstructor: Michael Sedler. How do we set boundaries and guidelines without it turning into a power struggle? Is the way we set up rules at the beginning of a year that important? Is there a way to help children understand parameters without getting them frustrated? Course No. ED4. 47. E, ED5. 47. EInstructor: Mary Ann Johnson. Based on the best- selling book ever on classroom management and student achievement, this course will help you make the first day of school, and every day, a success! This First Days of School: How to be an Effective Teacher is a must- have for new teachers and veterans alike. Regardless of your level of experience, you will enjoy the text so much that you will want to savor it instead of rushing through. Course No. ED4. 48i, ED5. Instructor: Mary Ann Johnson. This course provides an intriguing and unique look at the subject of differentiation. Part I of our text includes three completely fresh techniques for helping students understand why they will not all be doing the same things at the same time. Course No. ED4. 37. P, ED5. 37. PInstructor: Lawrence Rzeznik. Support kindness, respect for others, an attitude for service and a variety of other positive character traits by learning how to incorporate the literature and themes found in Dr. Seuss books, one of the most beloved of children's authors. Course No. ED4. 42. W, ED5. 42. WInstructor: Suzanne Warner. This independent study course focuses on practical solutions for the day- to- day frustrations and challenges common in today’s classroom. Course No. ED4. 29. W, ED5. 29. WInstructor: Michael Sedler. Throughout each day, educators are expected to balance academic demands with the personal aspects of each child. The purpose of this course is to help educators to become more organized in their preparation time and in their teaching style. Course No. SS4. 01. Q, SS5. 01. QInstructor: Michael Sedler. Research and teacher experience has demonstrated the importance of positive family involvement to student achievement. How can we create relationships and a climate where all families are allies and not adversaries of education? Course No. ED4. 44o, ED5. Instructor: Suzanne Warner. This independent study course focuses on putting the teacher in control of the classroom. The list of obstacles facing today’s teachers is enormous and this class will teach you alternatives to the typical methods that leave teachers feeling worn down and unsuccessful. Course No. SS4. 01. V, SS5. 01. VInstructor: Michael Sedler. Poor social skills are the leading reason why people lose jobs, according to Labor and Industry research. While educators know the importance of social skills, schools do not provide adequate training in this area. Course No. ED4. 19. G, ED5. 19. GInstructor: Michael Sedler. Psychologist Abraham Maslow noted specific human needs including safety and belonging. Unfortunately put- downs, gossip, and criticism abound throughout our schools leaving many students feeling isolated, picked- on and unsafe. Course No. ED4. 35. J, ED5. 35. JInstructor: Julie Bora. With or without lesson plans, you can be a super substitute. Discover tried and true K- 1. Find out how to pack your bag, set the course, and ride the waves of any given day. Learn about being prepared with your substitute's suitcase from a seasoned veteran and you and your students will have an extraordinary time together. Course No. ED4. 61. A, ED5. 61. AInstructor: Suzanne Warner. As a teacher do you ever feel overwhelmed? Burned- out? Do you feel as if you can’t get through to some students? That you lack administrative support? That you cannot connect with some parents? That you can’t get away from negativity when you go to the lunchroom or pass certain teachers in the hallway? That you lack important resources for yourself or your students? Perhaps you just can’t break out of your own rut. When Teaching Gets Tough offers practical strategies teachers can use to make things better right away. The text offers specific and distinct examples and strategies for addressing a plethora of difficult situations, as well providing as reflective opportunities and specific sections designed for administrators. The supplemental readings offer even more ideas and opportunities for exploring solutions. Once the course is completed, teachers will feel back on top of their game, re- energized, and know that they are making a positive difference in their lives and the lives of their students. Counseling & Special Ed. Course No. ED4. 50. H, ED5. 50. HInstructor: Lori Gibson. Traditional discipline plans usually frustrate chronically disruptive students and can be overkill for well- adjusted kids. Dr. Ross Greene's “Plan B” is a better approach for dealing with disruptive behavior. It assumes that even disruptive students want to succeed in school, but that they have obstacles in their lives which prevent them from being successful. Course No. ED4. 51. Z, ED5. 51. ZInstructor: Lori Gibson. Are kids at your school mean to each other? Of course they are. When kids are cruel to other kids not only does it do direct harm to the victims, it also affects the learning environment for everyone. Course No. ED4. 36. U, ED5. 36. UInstructor: Lori Gibson. Hack a Computer Only with just a IP Address in Easy steps. You’ll need to install the telnet client onto your Windows machine before you can hack your IP. It’s really easy to do, just follow these easy 4 steps: 1) In that same command Window you have open, you need to go to the folder where telnet should be installed. The easiest place is your C: drive so type in: cd C: This will bring you do the install folder that you will place the telnet program. Sometimes an incomplete version of telnet is installed. BAMKO-SURPLUS. serving the petrochemical industry in surplus sales and investment recovery. Contact: BAMKO-SURPLUS PROCESS EQUIPMENT LLC Phone: 409-942-4224. To check type in the command: ver telnet. If something pops up saying Microsoft Windows (telnet is a built in tool for Windows) you have an incomplete copy. Descarga de rooms, las mejores roms gratis para descargar, los mejores juegos retro para jugar en tu ordenador. Torrentz will always love you. Farewell. © 2003-2016 Torrentz. You will need to remove the older version before installing the new one. Remove the older version by typing in the command: del *.*You may get a prompt and enter Y (Don’t worry, you’ve specified above by when you typed in “ver telnet” that you want to delete the telnet installation so it will only delete that program) It may take a little while depending on the speed of your computer to uninstall the program. After that is complete enter the command: win ver telnet - i run. This will reinstall the new telnet client and now you will no longer see that message when you try to hack your IP. Let me know if you have any questions and good luck! SSRS in Visual Studio 2. How to COPY a Project to NEW NAME? I have a SSRS Reporting Solution Project that I want to COPY the entire contents of INTO an entirely new name and instance. Microsoft SQL Server is a relational database management system developed by Microsoft. As a database server, it is a software product with the primary function of. SETUP AND DEPLOYMENT IN VISUAL STUDIO 2010: INTRODUCTION: What happens if an architect designs a lot of architectural drawings and then does nothing with them? Visual Studio for Mac. Learn More Download. Build native Android, iOS, macOS, and Windows apps with Xamarin, plus websites and services with ASP.NET Core. Build a.NET Application on the Oracle Database with Microsoft Visual Studio 2010. by John Paul Cook. Learn the basic yet essential processes involved in building a. I want the original to be maintained and usable as it will continue to be developed and utilized, but.. I want to make a copy and then begin developing this copy down a different/separate path. HOW DO I DO THIS? My current Solution has: 3 Report RDLS1 Data- source. You'd think this would be easy but nothing ever seems to be easy. While in the current solution I simply clicked SAVE AS and created a new Name for the solution, but.. NOTHING copied over.. RDLs and Datasources remained the same.. Your help is greatly appreciated. Create and manage Reporting Services reports. TFS 2. 01. 7 | TFS 2. TFS 2. 01. 3Important. Excel reports, Reporting Services reports, and Share. Point dashboards are only supported for on- premises TFS. For information on what is supported for VSTS, see Dashboards, charts, & widgets. TFS 2. 01. 8 and later versions no longer support native integration with Share. Point products. If you're planning to upgrade to TFS 2. About Share. Point integration to learn about the options available to you. If you added SQL Server Reporting Services at installation, then your on- premises Team Foundation Server (TFS) deployment is configured with a data warehouse, SQL Server Analysis Services cube, and Reporting Services Reports. If you didn't add these services previously and want to add them now, see Add a report server to your deployment. You can create or customize your own Reporting Services reports which support the following scenarios: Allow users to update the report without granting them read access to the databases. Share your reports in Team Explorer under the Reports folder. Support subscriptions to reports that can be sent daily over email. Manage the properties of your reports so that they return results faster and use fewer server resources. Use Transact- SQL queries to retrieve the data for your reports. To learn more, see the following topics: Creating Reports for Team Foundation Server 2. Report Manager. (There are only minor schema changes introduced for the TFS 2. TFS 2. 01. 0). Customizing Reports for Team Foundation Server 2. Reporting Services that are provided with each process template. These reports use queries that are written in either SQL or Multidimensional Expressions (MDX). There are only minor schema changes introduced for the TFS 2. TFS 2. 01. 0). Table reference for the relational warehouse database. The warehouse contains data about builds, source code, test results and code coverage, and work items such as tasks and bugs. Data in the warehouse is collected from the operational stores and organized in a set of tables, views, and table- valued functions from which you can design reports. You can explore relationships between the integrated data sets by directly querying and creating reports from data that is stored in the relational warehouse database. Perspectives and measure groups provided in the Analysis Services cube. The Team System cube provides all metrics that are defined for all measure groups. By using the Analysis Services cube for TFS, you can generate reports of aggregated information about the data that is stored in team project collections. You can easily use this data to create Pivot. Table and Pivot. Chart reports in Microsoft Excel. Reportable fields reference. All data captured for work items is written to the WIT data store, but only select data is written to the Analysis Services data warehouse. The reportable attribute assigned to each work item field determines whether data is written to only the relational warehouse database or to both the relational warehouse and the OLAP cube. Reportable fields have their reportable attribute set to detail, dimension, or measure. You can access both the relational data warehouse and the Analysis Services cube to create highly customized reports by using these authoring tools. Report Builder 2. This application is optimized for Microsoft Office so that business users can work in that familiar environment. You can use Report Builder 2. Share. Point site. This application includes a wizard for creating tables or charts, in addition to query builders and an expression editor. It also supports the advanced reporting features in SQL Server 2. Reporting Services. You can download Report Builder for free from the following page on the Microsoft Web site: Microsoft SQL Server 2. Reporting Services Report Builder 2. Report Designer is a graphical interface for creating full- featured Reporting Services reports. After your report is finished, you have access to the full functionality for managing Reporting Services reports. To use Report Designer, you must know how to connect to and query a data source, but you do not have to know Report Definition Language (RDL). To use Report Designer, you must have Visual Studio and SQL Server Business Intelligence Development Studio. To learn more about how to work with authoring tool, see these articles: Designing and Implementing Reports (Reporting Services)Reporting Services in Business Intelligence Development Studio. Comparing Report Authoring Environments. Designing and Implementing Reports Using Report Builder 2. Q & AQ: How do I view and organize default Reporting Services reports? A: Open reports from Team Explorer, Team Web Access, or Report Manager. See Reporting Services Reports. Q: How do I upload a report? A: See Upload reports. Q: How do I manage report properties? A: After you create and publish reports, you can use Report Manager to view, organize, and configure those reports. By using Report Manager, you can group related reports in folders, adjust parameters and data sources, and schedule automated reports. See View, organize, and configure reports using Report Manager. When an AccurateRip program is installed, it will be in an unconfigured state for the reason no accurate rips can take place until the offset of your CD. Directed by Peter Weir. With Robin Williams, Robert Sean Leonard, Ethan Hawke, Josh Charles. English teacher John Keating inspires his students to look at poetry with. The technology builds on Touch ID and is called Face ID, of course. It uses a new selfie camera setup in the iPhone 10 called the “TrueDepth camera system.”. How Apple's New Face ID Works. Apple is rolling out facial recognition to unlock its new i. Phone X, as has been rumored for months and confirmed in leaks over the weekend. It’s i. Phone day! Read more The technology builds on Touch ID and is called Face ID, of course. It uses a new selfie camera setup in the i. Phone 1. 0 called the “True. Depth camera system.” True. Depth uses a set of sensors, cameras, and a dot projector to create an incredibly detailed 3. D map of your face. Face ID starts with an image of your face, but builds on top of it with the True. Depth’s dot projector, which will invisibly project over 3. We use the image and the dot pattern to push through neural networks to create a mathematical model of your face,” Apple’s Phil Schiller explained. This facial map improves each time you look at your phone, and Apple says it will recognize you even if you change your hairstyle, wear glasses, or put on a hat. Apple says Face ID will require “user attention” to work, so if you’re looking away or have your eyes closed, your phone won’t unlock. Given Apple’s longtime emphasis on security, the team worked with special effects mask- makers in Hollywood to make sure it would be difficult to spoof Face ID. Consumers who are squeamish about letting Apple map their face can rest a little easier knowing that—just like with Touch ID—their biometric data is never shipped back to Apple HQ and remains stored safely on their device. Face ID’s facial recognition technology will build on Touch ID in several key ways. Just as Touch ID builds a 3. D model of your finger’s ridges, Apple’s facial recognition will create a 3. D map of a user’s face, which should make it less susceptible to compromise (contrast that with this researcher’s experience unlocking a Samsung device with a selfie). But unlike Touch ID, which requires you to place your finger on the sensor several times during setup, Face. ID only needs to scan your face once. Then you’re good to go. For Touch ID, the false unlock rate was pretty damn good: Touch. ID only had a 1 in 5. But Face ID is even better: it’s only got a 1 in 1,0. Schiller said. However, Face ID can still mistake you for a relative, Schiller explained. The statistics are lower if the person shares a close genetic relationship with you,” he said. So keep that fancy new i. Phone away from your evil twin. Opinion. We've noticed you're adblocking. We rely on advertising to help fund our award- winning journalism. We urge you to turn off your ad blocker for The Telegraph website so that you can continue to access our quality content in the future. Thank you for your support. Armitage Tutorial - Cyber Attack Management for Metasploit. I. Table of Contents. The RTL-SDR software defined radio combined with SDRSharp and a program called'digital speech decoder' (DSD) can be used as a radio scanner to easily and cheaply. About Armitage. Before we begin.. Getting Started. How to get any woman to talk to you. User Interface Tour. So many pretty screenshots. Host Management. You've got to find them to hack them. Exploitation. This is the fun stuff. Post- Exploitation. This is the really fun stuff. Maneuver. Getting around the network and on to more targets. Team Metasploit. This is cyber attack management! Scripting Armitage. The next step.. 1. About Armitage. 1. What is Armitage? Armitage is a scriptablered team collaboration tool for Metasploit that visualizes targets, recommends exploits. Through one Metasploit instance, your team will: Use the same sessions. Share hosts, captured data, and downloaded files. Communicate through a shared event log.
Run bots to automate red team tasks. Armitage is a force multiplier for red team operations. Cobalt Strike. Cobalt Strike is a toolset for Adversary Simulations and Red Team Operations. As of. October 2. Cobalt Strike does not share code with Armitage or depend on the Metasploit Framework. You can. use Armitage to fire Cobalt Strike's Beacon payload with a Metasploit exploit. You can also tunnel Metasploit. Cobalt Strike Beacon. The second half of this video shows Armitage and Cobalt Strike working. Cyber Attack Management. Armitage organizes Metasploit's capabilities around the hacking process. There are features for discovery, access. This section describes these features at a high- level, the rest of this. Armitage's dynamic workspaces let you define and switch between target criteria quickly. Use this to. segment thousands of hosts into target sets. Armitage also launches scans and imports data from many security. Armitage visualizes your current targets so you'll know the hosts you're working with and where you have sessions. Armitage recommends exploits and will optionally run active checks to tell you which exploits will work. If these options fail, use the Hail Mary attack to unleash Armitage's smart automatic exploitation against. Once you're in, Armitage exposes post- exploitation tools built into the Meterpreter. With the click of a menu you will escalate your privileges, log keystrokes, dump password hashes. Armitage makes it trivial to setup and use pivots. You'll use compromised hosts as a hop to attack your. Armitage uses Metasploit's SOCKS proxy module to let you use external tools. These features allow you to maneuver through the network. The rest of this manual is organized around this process, providing what you need to know in the order. Necessary Vocabulary. To use Armitage, it helps to understand Metasploit. Here are a few things you must know: Metasploit is a console driven application. Anything you do in Armitage is. Metasploit understands. You can bypass Armitage and type commands yourself (covered later). If. you're lost in a console, type help and hit enter. Metasploit presents its capabilities as modules. Every scanner, exploit, and payload is. To launch a module, you must set one or more options to configure the module. This process is uniform for all modules and Armitage makes this process easier for you. When you exploit a host, you will have a session on that host. Armitage. knows how to interact with shell and meterpreter sessions. Meterpreter is an advanced agent that makes a lot of post- exploitation functionality available to you. Armitage is built to take advantage of Meterpreter. Working with Meterpreter is covered later. The Metasploit Unleashed course maintained by the. Offensive Security folks is excellent. I recommend reading it before. Getting Started. 2. Requirements. Armitage exists as a client and a server that allow red team collaboration to happen. The Armitage client package is. Windows, Mac. OS X, and Linux. Armitage does NOT require a local copy of the Metasploit Framework to. These getting started instructions are written assuming that you would like to connect to a local instance of the. Metasploit Framework. Armitage requires the following: To quickly install all of the dependencies, you have a few. Use a Linux distribution for penetration testing such as Kali Linux. Pentoo Linux. These. Metasploit and its dependencies installed for. Use the MSF. Installer Script created by Dark. Operator. This option will. Git for updates. Use the official. Rapid. 7. This option will require you to. Rapid. 7 to get updates. Kali Linux. Kali Linux comes with the Metasploit Framework installed. This is a good option if. Armitage quickly. Setup Instructions (do these once!)Open a terminal. Start the database: service postgresql start. Initialize the database: service metasploit start. Stop the metasploit service: service metasploit stop. Install/Update Armitage: apt- get update ; apt- get install armitage. Use Java 1. 7 by default (3. Kali): update- java- alternatives - -jre - s java- 1. Use Java 1. 7 by default (6. Kali): update- java- alternatives - -jre - s java- 1. How to Start Armitage. Open a terminal. Start the Postgre. SQL database: service postgresql start(this does not happen automatically in Kali Linux)cd /path/to/armitage./armitage. How to update Metasploit. Open a terminalmsfupdateservice metasploit startservice metasploit stop. Back. Track Linux. Back. Track Linux is no longer a supported environment for Armitage. Please move over to Kali Linux. If you want to continue to use Back. Track Linux, you must uninstall. Metasploit Framework and install the latest dependencies. Due to. dependency changes (far outside of my control) in the framework, your. Back. Track Linux environment will not work if you update Metasploit. To uninstall the Metasploit Framework: cd /opt/metasploit. Linux. Install the Metasploit Framework and its dependencies. Extract armitage. Change to the folder you installed armitage into. Use ./armitage to start Armitage. Windows. Windows is not a supported environment to run Armitage with the Metasploit Framework. You may connect Armitage on. Windows to a team server hosted on Linux. Manual Setup. If you choose to setup the Metasploit Framework and its dependencies by hand, here are a few hard and fast. You need a Postgre. SQL database. No other database is supported. PATH$MSF_DATABASE_CONFIG must point to a YAML file$MSF_DATABASE_CONFIG must be available to msfrpcd and armitagethe msgpack ruby gem is required. Take a look at the following resources for help in this area: 2. Updating Metasploit. When you run msfupdate, it's possible that you may break Armitage by doing this. The Metasploit team. That said, things still break from time to time. Sometimes the framework changes in a way that's not compatible until. I update Armitage. If you run msfupdate and Armitage stops working, you have a few options. You can run msfupdate later and hope the issue gets fixed. Many times this is a valid. You can downgrade Metasploit to the last revision I tested it against. Take a look at the change log file for the latest development release tested against Armitage. The revision number. To downgrade Metasploit: cd /path/to/metasploit/msf. Reinstall Metasploit using the installer provided by Rapid. The Metasploit installer includes the latest. Metasploit. Usually, this release is very stable. If you're preparing to use Armitage and Metasploit somewhere important- -do not run msfupdate and. It's very important to stick with what you know works or test the functionality you need to make. When in doubt, go with option (2) or (3). Troubleshooting Help. If you're having trouble connecting Armitage to Metasploit, click the Help button to get. This button will take you to the Armitage Startup Troubleshooting Guide. Quick Connect. If you'd like to quickly connect Armitage to a Metasploit server without filling in the setup. Here's an example connect. If you have to manage multiple Armitage/Metasploit servers, consider creating a desktop shortcut that calls this. User Interface Tour. Overview. The Armitage user interface has three main panels: modules, targets, and tabs. You may click the area between. Modules. The module browser lets you launch a Metasploit auxiliary module, throw an exploit, generate a payload. Click through the tree to find the desired module. Double click the. Armitage will configure the module to run against the selected hosts. This works for auxiliary modules. Running a module against multiple hosts is one of the big advantages of Armitage. In the. Metasploit console, you must configure and launch an exploit and post modules for each host you're working. You can search modules too. Installing VMware Tools on Kali Linux – Doctor Chaos. TIP: I recommend enabling SSH first on Kali Linux, and then doing this over an SSH shell so you can copy and paste the commands. To enable SSH on Kali Linux, follow the guide on Dr. Chaos at http: //www. If you are using Kali Linux and trying to use it in a VM environment as a guest operating system on VMware you may run into some issues. It is recommended that you install VM Tools for VMware on Kali Linux. Update: March 1. 2th, 2. We now have sections for Kali Linux 1. Kali Linux Version 1. Step 1: If you have not already done so, ensure you are using the latest version of Kali Linux. Step 2: The latest version of vmware- tools at this date compiles against the Kali Linux kernel, it is normal you will get several warnings. Kali Linux 1. 1. 0 and later utilizes a set of vmware- tool patches to facilitate the installation. Next, mount the VMware tools ISO by clicking “Install VMware Tools” from the appropriate menu. Once the VMware Tools ISO has been attached to the virtual machine, copy the installer to the downloadsdirectory and then run the installer script : cd ~/vmware- tools- patchescp/media/cdrom/VMware. Tools* downloads/./untar- and- patch- and- compile. Step 3: Reboot your system. Installing VMWare Tools on Kali Linux 1. This guide will help you install VM Tools on any installation of Kali Linux (including 6. ISOs). It will also allow you to use Kali Linux in VMware ESXi environments. The first thing you need to do on Kali Linux is prep the system for VM Tools. You do so by issuing the following commands: TIP: I recommend enabling SSH first on Kali Linux, and then doing this over an SSH shell so you can copy and paste the commands. To enable SSH on Kali Linux, follow the guide on Dr. Chaos at http: //www. Note: all commands are typed as one line in the terminalecho cups enabled > > /usr/sbin/update- rc. Note: This is typed as one lineln- s/usr/src/linux- headers- $(uname - r)/include/generated/uapi/linux/version. Next, mount the VMware tools ISO by clicking “Install VMware Tools” NOTE: These steps differ depending on if you are using Mac, Windows, or ESXi. You may need to download VMWare tools for the operating system. This should mount VMWare tools (virtual) CD into Kali. Next go the command linemkdir/mnt/vmwaremount/dev/cdrom /mnt/vmware/cp- rf/mnt/vmware/VMware. Tools*/tmp/Next, you will change to the /tmp directory and run the VM Tools installation script. VMware. Tools- *. The last command ” ./vmware- tools- install. VM Tools installation script. Follow the onscreen instructions when you run the script and accept the defaults. Follow the prompts for the VMware Tools installation and you are done. You can accept all the default prompts. You are complete with the installation of VMWare Tools for Kali Linux. Reboot your system. Optional Clean- Up. Lastly, to get rid of possible VMware service errors, edit the /etc/init. IFS=. set — `uname - r`Now replace the line with the following: set — `uname - r|cut - d“- “ - f. Once you have edited your file, reboot your system. Slow Mouse Movement If your mouse movement is slow and sluggish in a Kali Linux VMware guest, try installing the xserver- xorg- input- vmmouse package in the Kali guest. Reboot your system. Watch Dan Doh Episodes Online. Select a Similar Series. G. U. Returner (OVA). G. U. Trilogy (Movie). GIFT (OVA). hack//Liminality (OVA). Sekai no Mukou ni (Movie). Versus - The Thanatos Report (OVA)0. Ghost. 10. 0% Pascal- sensei. Sai. Chicchana Mune no Tokimeki. Sai. Chicchana Mune no Tokimeki 2nd Season. X2=Shinobuden. 3- gatsu no Lion. Hoken Taiiku. 5cm Per Second (Movie)Aa! Megami- sama (2. 00. Aa! 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Gate: Jieitai Kanochi nite, Kaku Tatakaeri. Gekijouban Yowamushi Pedal (Movie)Gekkan Shoujo Nozaki- kun. Gen'ei o Kakeru Taiyou. Genji Monogatari Sennenki. Genshiken. Genshiken (2. OVA)Genshiken 2. Genshiken Nidaime. Genshiken Nidaime no Roku (OVA)Getsuyoubi no Tawawa (Web)Ghost Hound. Giant Killing. Gift: Eternal Rainbow. Gifuu Doudou!! Kanetsugu to Keiji. Gilgamesh. Gin no Guardian. Gin no Saji. Gin no Saji 2. Gin'iro no Olynssis. Ginban Kaleidoscope. Ginga e Kickoff!! Girl Who Leapt Through Space. Girlfriend (Kari)Glass no Hana to Kowasu Seka (Movie)Go! Go! 5. 75. Gochuumon wa Usagi Desuka? Gochuumon wa Usagi Desuka?? Gokicha!! Cockroach Girl! Web)Goku Sayonara Zetsubou Sensei (OVA)Gokujo. Gokurakuin Joshikou Ryou Monogatari. Gokujou Seitokai. Gokukoku no Brynhildr. Gokusen. Goshuushou- sama Ninomiya- kun. Goulart Knights: Evoked the Beginning Black (OVA)Grappler Baki. Grappler Baki: Saidai Tournament Hen. Grave of the Fireflies (Movie)Gravitation. Gravitation OVA (OVA)Gravity Daze The Animation: Ouverture (TV Special)Grenadier: Hohoemi no Senshi. Grisaia no Kajitsu. Grisaia no Meikyuu (TV Special)Gugure! Fan. Fiction. Author has written 2. Sailor Moon, Naruto, Matantei Loki Ragnarok, Bleach, Fullmetal Alchemist, D N Angel, Gundam Wing/AC, Inuyasha, Whistle!, Harry Potter, Yu- Gi- Oh, Mega Man, Pokémon, Ranma, Yu Yu Hakusho, My Little Pony, Supernatural, Fate/stay night, Charmed, Constantine, Hellsing, Doctor Who, Slayers, Magical Girl Lyrical Nanoha, Silent Hill, Once Upon a Time, Sonic the Hedgehog, Chrono Crusade, Kingdom Hearts, Star Wars, Katekyo Hitman Reborn!, Hunter X Hunter, Ghost Hunt, Fruits Basket, Hell Girl, Shugo Chara!, Kuroshitsuji, Black Cat, xxx. HOLi. C, Avalon Web of Magic, Transformers, Old Kingdom/Abhorsen series, Enchanter, Maximum Ride, Artemis Fowl, Wolf's Rain, Pandora Hearts, One Piece, Beka Cooper series, Final Destination, Soul Eater, Zatch Bell, Night School, Fairy Tail, Tsubasa Chronicle, Mai Hi. ME, Rosario + Vampire, Avengers, Tsukihime, Resident Evil series, Rise of the Guardians, Howl's Moving Castle, Ghost Rider, Card Captor Sakura, Elfen Lied, Sekirei, X- Men: The Movie, Ouran High School Host Club, Looking for Group, Law and Order: SVU, Rising of the Shield Hero/盾の勇者の成り上がり, Grimm, Guild Hunter series, Jurassic Park, High School Dx. D/ハイスクールD×D, Natsume Yūjin- Chō, Scorpion, Familiar of Zero, Thor, Miraculous: Tales of Ladybug & Cat Noir, Flash, Sherlock, and RWBY. Yay! I am finally able to tell others about myself! I am 2. 8 and have an evil bed stealing boxer. Most likely a majority of my fanfics will be crossovers, so chances are pretty slim that the characters will match the original! I hope you like 'em! Please note that almost every single one of my fanfics will be rated T for swear words and some violence. I can't help but curse in any fanfic that I write, Sorry. I'm a total Yaoi addict, so chances are very high that some of my stories will have boy/boy pairings. As for why my subjects go all over the place.. I read. A LOT. So if you have an interesting plot twist, PM me and I'll see what I can do. ALL HAIL THE GODDESSES THAT ARE ANKO MITARASHI, YORUICHI SHIHOUIN AND LUNA LOVEGOOD!! IF YOU HAVE ANY INTERESTING IDEAS FOR THE FANFICS FEEL FREE TO PM ME. I'LL TRY TO INCLUDE THEM IF I CAN! PE- mail me at sakurademonalchemist@yahoo. And to save a lot of space in the fanfics, if I actually owned any of these anime/mangas why would I be writing fanfics about them for free?(/)_(/)(='.'=) BUNNY!(")_(") FOR ALL THOSE WHO ADMIT TO BEING WEIRD AND ARE PROUD OF IT, COPY AND PASTE THE RABBIT ONTO YOUR PROFILES! ALL HAIL THOSE WHO ARE PROUD TO BE DIFFERENT! Well, everyone I have good news and bad news. The good news is that I finally graduated High School on 1. For everyone who leaves negative reviews, I have only one request. IF YOU ARE GOING TO FLAME ME, MAKE IT CONSTRUCTIVE. I don't care about bad reviews unless you point out a flaw I can work on. To my readers, I thank you! I thank you for NOT using the terms Mary Sue or Gary Stu in ANY of your reviews! If you'd like a laugh, then you'll love this. RANDOMNESS RULES!! Things to do in a shop when you are bored. Get 2. 4 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's carts when they aren't looking. Set all the alarm clocks in Electronics to go off at 5- minute intervals. Make a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to the rest rooms. Walk up to an employee and tell him/her in an official tone, " 'Code 3' in housewares".. Go the Service Desk and ask to put a bag of M& M's on lay away. Move a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. Set up a tent in the camping department and tell other shoppers you'll invite them in if they'll bring pillows from the bedding department. When a clerk asks if they can help you, begin to cry and ask, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?"9. Look right into the security camera & use it as a mirror, and pick your nose. While handling guns in the hunting department, ask the clerk if he knows where the anti - depressants are. Dart around the store suspiciously loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme song. In the auto department, practice your "Madonna look" using different size funnels. Hide in a clothing rack and when people browse through, say "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!"1. When an announcement comes over the loud speaker, assume the fetal position and scream. NO! NO! It's those voices again!!"1. Go into a fitting room and shut the door and wait a while and then yell, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here! Get several bouncy balls and throw them down an aisle shouting "pikachu, I choose you!"Repost this if you laughed.. Or are planning to do any of these things. Things To Ponder: Why is it considered necessary to nail down the lid of a coffin? Why don't you ever see the headline "Psychic Wins Lottery"? Why doesn't glue stick to the inside of the bottle? Why is it that doctors call what they do "practice"? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance that little indestructible black box is? Can fat people go skinny- dipping? If a person with multiple personalities threatens suicide, is that considered a hostage situation? If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose? So what's the speed of dark? How come abbreviated is such a long word? Since light travels faster than sound, isn't that why some people appear bright until you hear them speak? Ever wonder what the speed of lightning would be if it didn't zigzag? A bus station is where a bus stops. A train station is where a Train stops On my desk, I have a work station. If quitters never win, and winners never quit, what fool came up with, "Quit while you're ahead"? Do Lipton employees take coffee breaks? Should women put pictures of missing husbands on beer cans? Why do they put pictures of criminals up in the Post Office? What are we supposed to do . How much deeper would oceans be if sponges didn't live there? If you can't be kind, at least have the decency to be vague. After eating, do amphibians need to wait an hour before getting OUT of the water? Why don't they just make mouse- flavored cat food? If you're sending someone some Styrofoam, what do you pack it in? Why do they sterilize needles for lethal injections? Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste funny? Isn't Disney World a people trap operated by a mouse? Whose cruel idea was it for the word "lisp" to have an "s" in it? Why can't you find fresh sardines in the fish market? Why do so many old people eat at cafeterias? Why does an "X" stand for a kiss? Why does the word "Filipino" start with the letter F ? Why are the copyright dates on movies and television shows written in Roman numbers? Some favorite (and completely weirdo) sayings: I write for the same reason that I breath. I didn't then I would die. I had a thought but it got lonely and went away. Money talks and mine says "Good- bye."Went into the grinder and came out as hair. Touch it and see if it's hot (you just had to be there for that one)It's okay to talk to yourself, it's okay to ask yourself questions, it's even okay to answer those questions. Just don't ever ask yourself a question and then go "huh?"Honesty is the best policy, but insanity is a better defense. Don't spend money you don't have cause at some point they're going to want it and you're still not going to have it. A friend will bail you out of jail at two o'clock in the morning but a true friend will be sitting in the cell beside you saying "Damn that was fun!"A friend will help you move but a true friend will help you move a body. Due to the worsening of the economy the light at the end of the tunnel has been temporarily turned off. I do not suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it. My train of thought got derailed. If someone gave you half a brain, you'd still only have half a brain. All things in the world are mind over matter; if you don't mind then it doesn't matter. Close only counts in horseshoes and handgrenades. Most people have a filter between their brain and their mouth that tells them when they shouldn't say something. Me, not so much. Shut up brain or I'll stab you with a Q- tip again. I tried to keep an open mind but my brains kept falling out. The more things change, the more things remain. You have hate mail. Disney comes up with some real winners.)Knowledge is power. BE EVIL! Your talking is getting in the way of my telling you to shut up. I'm in hillbilly hell! My IQ is dropping by the second! I'm becoming one of them! Why is the rum gone?!'Stress' A condition brought on by over riding the body's desire to kick someone's ass. |
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